2025 was a year in which spaces that had been made in our family life, by loss and letting go, were filled, gradually and wonderfully.

Circumstances had led to a reduction of our friends; a narrowing of our social circle to the point of some feelings of isolation. 2025 brought the return of old friends and the beginnings of new friendships. These friends have welcomed us into their homes and settled themselves into ours. We have quietly battled imposter syndrome, fearing that, at some inevitable point, they will discover that we are not their kind of people after all. Nevertheless, they have continued to have an open-hearted approach to our family, even when our differences have been clear. We felt we had lost a little of this life of friendship and community, and we had missed it a great deal, but in 2025, that space has been filled again.

We are Christians, and although our faith remained precious to us, we had found ourselves struggling to engage and connect with Church. We persevered in trying to make a particular church work for us, but consistently found ourselves drained and frustrated by these endeavours. Eventually, we accepted that, as a family, we were a square peg trying to cram ourselves into a round hole. The result was a general crushing of our spirits. We stepped away, and we tentatively tried something else: a different church community, where we found ourselves able to breathe again spiritually. So 2025 brought us a fuller, freer expression of faith community, too.

Through the year, our home and land also began to be filled, with a growing number of animals. As a child, I loved animals, and I dreamed of living in the countryside with lots of them. Now, my children share this love, and we do live in the countryside. 2025 became the year when we felt able to take on more pets. It began with my son’s purchasing of a fish tank with his birthday money. This was closely followed by the addition of our leopard gecko, Lenny. Later, two goats and more chickens arrived, and as the year drew to a close, we welcomed two kittens. Being able to fill our lives with all these pets has felt like a blessing. They teach us all so much about love, patience and trust, and they bring us so much joy.

We have continued to watch our children grow up with deepening love and admiration. There have been huge struggles and challenges for them this year, and for us in our parenting. And yet, our hearts could not be fuller as we see them continue to persevere, overcome and mature.

I know what I hope for in 2026, but I also see from 2025 and the years that have gone before, that life and dreams and hope are a long game. Fullness of life comes from the ebb and flow of loss, letting go, and embracing the new. It comes from faith and patience; making space and waiting; from having courage and an open heart. Only an open heart can expect to be filled. Sometimes, old ideas and routines and expectations have to be broken to create that space and openness.

As 2025 draws to a close, I still have unrealised dreams that ache a little, but I pray that in 2026 I will wait and watch without impatience. I know I can trust in God’s goodness, and I know that his Spirit will bring fullness even to the spaces and the broken parts and the waiting.

Psalm 23 (NIV) (a song from the Bible)

The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul.He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake.

Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.

Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life,and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.